The Time I Almost Got Arrested

Have you ever faced a moment in your life where you thought, ‘This is it’? A time you thought you were done for? A moment where everything you had worked towards any kind of future was about to be washed away? Fresh out of high school I had a moment like that. I was 18, the absolute dumbest version of myself. Being now older and wiser I can look back and laugh. This is the one and only time I thought I had ruined my life and was going to jail. It was 2018 and the first summer after my boys and I all graduated. A couple of my friends wanted to go on a really big camping trip together. Obviously that sounded really fun because that would make it the first time ever we all went out together for a few days without any of our parents. At the time that was actually kind of a big deal.

 Once we established the crew it didn’t take long for us to save up for the trip because of the shares we made in a money pool. With the bodies we had, we already had problems right from the start. Six people per campsite, eight of us. So of course a lot of half-assed, not so good suggestions were made getting over this hump. Through a lot of dumb luck, all these ideas did not have to become anything more than that; ideas. As teenage boys do, communication can take a backseat sometimes. A few days prior to needing to reserve the campsite, a couple boys messaged us about how they forgot they had things scheduled already. One including the guy who reserved the spot, Jimmy. 

Jimmy, Kevin, and I had gone to reserve the spot. After some really lucky convincing we got the grounds owners to be okay with us bringing eight people to one site. Somehow everything seemed to be turning out according to plan. The completely parent ridden event had come along pretty well. And the trip went pretty well for a while. Despite a few minor changes the trip was everything we hoped it to be. It was not until Saturday the whole crew finally showed. Things had gone pretty well considering a lack of schedule. We found a large tree while swimming, dead on a rocky hill. Any group of young boys could see that close to water and think one thing. That tree is getting dunked! After an hour of us loosely conducting this and nearly it rolling on top of us a few times, we had succeeded. We decided to celebrate by riding it like a boat until we got bored. Success can grow an appetite, it was dinner time.

 Once we got to camp, no decision after that was a good one. Kevin and I wanted to shower but they were full. I had the stupid idea of, “How ‘bout we use the women’s? It’s just a shower.” I rationalized my plan, thinking I will just shower with my girlfriend. As for Kevin I really just hoped for the best. For some reason, I thought being quiet while in the wrong bathroom was only natural. Not for Kevin, he kept telling dumb jokes. This happened a few times until I heard a question that made my heart sink deep into my stomach. “Are there boys in here!?” echoes through the showers and my eardrums. Kevin’s response made me feel even worse. “Of course there’s boys in here, you dumb bitch!” 

After that all I hear is a scoff and a door shut. Realizing the situation, I quickly get my shorts on and turn the corner to the next stall telling Kevin to do the same. We gathered and left as fast as we could. We are immediately met by what I can best describe as a convoy. A line of women, marching toward the restroom. Yelling at us, Kevin was one to run away as quickly as he could. As for me, I guess an apology was futile. I will always remember one of them saying, “You are not of the vagina.” and was immediately embarrassed. I peel around the restrooms dashing to my car with Kevin. My exit was not fast enough, they got my vehicle description. I foolishly drive not far at all to the campsite.

Once there, we try to explain everything to the boys. I suddenly saw something in the shadows. It was a squad car! It was creeping around discreetly, likely looking for my car. We all rally into the tent under my frantic order. We wait for the car to circle around and get out of here. We start unfolding out of the tent, once safe. Only for us to find out it was a decoy. A second squad car was far enough back for us to not notice. Boom. Every strobe light that car had was flashed on us, we’ve been had. At this point I am dying inside. I had never gotten in this much trouble. I did not know what was coming next but I knew what I shouldn’t do, and that was panic. Before the police were within an earshot I told Kevin and my girlfriend that I would speak for everything. The cops ordered all of us to take a seat. They started out with simple questions. During this, I gave short answers. All for the situation to go by quicker. It was getting really annoying because eventually we had literally three squad cars at the site. A seven man cocktail of camp rangers, policemen, and a sheriff. At least three different times a uniform came up to me with their hands on their hips and asked me, “Did you really go into the women's restroom?” and then walk away with their head. Making me feel perverted.

The only chess move of the night was saying it was only me in the showers and they probably thought my girl was another boy. I say this as Kevin was only 17. Minors getting in trouble equals parent phone calls, and I was not dealing with that, too. They stand me up and ask me to follow them to my car. They ask for my I.D. so they can run it. This is the one and only moment where I'm standing alone. I still remember the second I looked down at my shoes and thought, “This is the night that ruins the rest of my life.” It was just me and my worries as I did nothing but wait. To my surprise, they came back with not so terrible news. I was not going to jail, and I was not going on any list. All they did was put a strike on the campground record, told us not to do anything else stupid, and we had too many campers for one site. *eye roll* 

My stress never ceased until I was home the next day. I was okay never going there again. Getting away from it all, I realize that my parents never caught wind of this. I was taking a family trip to that same campground since it was local. It was surreal being there again just two weeks later. Traumatized while Sitting with my mom, sipping iced tea as if nothing ever happened. To this day, they still don’t know the whole story. As a policeman once said, “Don’t do anything else stupid.” To that I can say I haven’t gotten into police trouble since then. And I haven’t entered any other women’s restrooms (on purpose). And shoutout to Jimmy who now has a strike at a place he’s never camped at. 

-Isaac William Joesph